Lord Burgahmont! I need to have words with you my gilded lamplighter has gone missing and it seems the one you wield right now is a striking doppelganger.
Oh Lord Pelshfuit, it is indeed your gilded lamplighter as I absconded with it one fortnight ago as payment for my bejangled pony saddle you borrowed but never returned to me.
How dare you Lord Burgahmont! I removed from your possession that magnificent bejangled pony saddle as recompense for the ruby lined wheelbarrow that you pilfered from my garden sanctuary some score ago.
What a scallywag you are Lord Pelshfuit that wheelbarrow was “pilfered” as if the word applied, as payment for the 14-carat gold diamond encrusted revolving tray
Curses on you Lord Burgahmont you scheming knows no bounds or honor. That 14-carat gold diamond encrusted revolving tray is in my possession as a boon ensuring you return my crystallin hourglass filled with the ashes of Michel de Nostredame.
A pox on you home Lord Pelshifuit Your dark heart matches your treachery well. The crystallin hourglass filled with the ashes of Michel de Nostredame is mine, because of the platinum covered grimoire of Prezckt~tul the denier that you walked out of my home with after drinking the last of my gin.
Hellfire consume your bones Lord Burgahmont and the hounds of the devil hump your legs with their firey genitals. The grimoire is bound safely buy the chains of light in my basement because you snitched off with my clockwork demon forged by the unearthly craftsman Shake Zerfmon and animated by the unbound soul of Shakespeare and an illiterate monk.
May the dark tendrils of Bleethes~zekfel the eyeless see'er pull out the teeth from your head make a necklace to adorn his infernal daughter and turn your toes to tongues so you can taste all of the feces pouring from your lying lips. That clockwork demon is to replace the …
and they went on like this for eternity.